Tag Archives: alien

“Somewhere Safe”

Good morning Everyone!


I have long known that someday I will open a closet door, and in a manner akin to Fibber McGee’s closet, every pen I have ever lost will come cascading out of it onto my head, at which time I will have the fortunate opportunity to practice self-restraint by NOT swearing, but rather observing , “Behold, my head hath just been struck by one thousand three hundred seventy-eight pens in less than five seconds.”

Fibber McGee's Closer

Fibber McGee’s Closet

What I have recently discovered is that the contents of the closet will not only include pens but all of the items that I have stored “somewhere safe” over the years, only to discover when I needed an item that “somewhere safe” was so safe that it even protected the item from me.

The frustrating thing about “somewhere safe” is that once I start looking for a particular item that resides there, I see the item in my mind’s eye, and have the nagging feeling that if I just thought a little bit harder I could find its secure hiding place.


Somewhere safe?

The latest in a long list of items that I can’t seem to put my hands on is the card reader which will read Mark’s Nikon camera card.  When I was searching for the download cable, which I never found, I ran across it, and I could have sworn (another feature of “somewhere safe”) that I placed it with the other download cables that didn’t work.  It’s not there now, though.

Alien, Remote

Alien with his sinister experiment remote control

I do wonder where the pens and other stuff are being hidden until that grand glorious day when they all shower themselves upon me from Fibber McGee’s closet’s first cousin – Shangri-La, where a couple of bored monks are making life merry by watching me hunt for items they have “borrowed” through a hidden camera?  Maybe they are being stored in a secret vault buried deep in a missile silo in Nebraska or Montana as part of a secret government conspiracy.  Maybe they are being abducted by aliens as part of a sinister experiment with purpose unknown.   (Exactly how many ways can you use a plethora of pens and papers, sprinkled through with loose screws, a card reader, several books, twelve magazines and at least three chew toys?)  Maybe they are being stolen and stored by a doomsayer anxious to survive the days after the apocalypse with enough pens to see him or her through.  All I know for sure is that they can’t possibly be disappearing because I simply lose them.

Until the answers are revealed, if they ever are, open your closets with care.  I’d hate it if you got injured opening my “safe” storage cabinet by mistake.

Have a great day!