Category Archives: Child’s Play

Privacy, or the Lack Thereof!


Good morning Everyone!

Newfound Gap

Kayla, this Thanksgiving in the Smoky Mountains

By a show of hands, how many of you out there who have children love them?

Hands Lifted

Hands voting, from Print Shop Professional 2.0

That’s what I thought; me too.

dog, kitchen, pets

Darwin and Mandy in the kitchen

Again by a show of hands, how many of you who have dogs love them too?

Show of hands

Show of hands

Almost as many, but I can tell there are just a few of you that put up with the dog(s) in consideration of your significant other, or your children.  That’s cool; at least you understand the bond between dog and owner.

dog, sofa

Could you leave this face outside?

For those of you who have dogs, how many of you have indoor dogs?  (An indoor dog is defined as a dog that spends a substantial part of his or her time inside the house with the family.)

Again, not as many; whether to keep a dog indoors on a regular basis versus outdoors is somewhat of a controversial topic among dog owners.  We have always kept our dogs indoors; that allows them to be more part of the family, but other people feel it is kinder to the dog to keep it outside where it has more room.  In addition, some dogs, like farm dogs and other working dogs, might even prefer to be left outdoors.

Arrow, right

Okay, now for those of you who have children and/or indoor dogs, how many of you miss the days when you could take a shower or spend time in your bathroom with ultimate privacy and no interruptions?

Hands Lifted

Hands voting, from Print Shop Professional 2.0

Me too.

Yesterday, I was taking my morning shower in the “master” bathroom.  In our new house, the “master” bathroom is so-called simply because it is connected to the master bedroom.  (In the United States, the master bedroom is the biggest bedroom in a house.)  It is a postage stamp sized room with a shower, and with the door shut, the shower running and the fan on , you simply cannot hear anything else going on in the rest of the house.

Shower

From Print Shop Professional 2.0

So, to return to my tale, yesterday I was taking my shower, enjoying the warm steamy water and the relative quiet, when after a while I became aware of a rhythmic banging coming from somewhere else in the house.  Since it was only myself and Kayla and the dogs in the house, and the dogs not possessing hands with which to bang that hard, it didn’t take much deduction to realize that Kayla was trying to get my attention for some reason.  Not being in a condition to traipse out of the shower at that precise moment, I had to scream, at the top of my lungs, that I was in the shower and couldn’t hear anything so I needed her to come into the bedroom and crack the bathroom door to tell me what she needed.  (Tres elegante, no?).

Elegance, flowers, green background

Elegance

She started to open the door, and as soon as she did, I said, rather sharply, “What Kayla?”  Rather than speaking she started to close the door.  I took a deep breath to calm myself and in a more even tone told her I wanted to know what she needed.  The door then swung fully open so that I could respond to the great emergency.

Door Opening, from Print Shop Professional 2.0

What was it?  She wanted to know if she had put too much detangler in her hair.

Sigh.

Have a great day everyone!

Nancy

Sprouty and the Planets


Good morning Everyone!

Sprouty and the Planets is not a rock band, but rather the two topics of discussion today, both of which involve school projects Kayla has done.

Really, “the Planets” should just be “Venus” but putting Venus in the title of anything is not a good idea these days in the wild world of span.  Even searching for Venus on the internet isn’t that great.  The first time Kayla tried on her computer, she just put the word “Venus” in the search bar, and since her computer has very strict parental controls, most of the first results were blocked.  What she ended up having to use was something like “Venus planet NASA space” to get any results at all.  But I’m getting ahead of myself.  We need to start with Sprouty.

Meet Sprouty!

Sprouty is basically a home-made version of a chia pet, I think, but it was done as a school project.  If you don’t know what a chia pet is, google the phrase.  Then when you come back and ask me why they were such a big deal, my answer will be that I don’t know, but then, this is the same country where the “pet rock” was invented.  What really astounded me was to find out that 500,000 chia pets are sold every year, still!
Anyway, I digress.  (You’re shocked, I know.)  Sprouty was a science project that did not involve a grade – the kids took the foot end of a panty hose, stuffed dirt into the end until the dirt formed a ball, then tied off the panty hose with a sort of a wick still trailing down, sprinkled grass seeds over the dirt ball, then decorated a cup to their heart’s content.  To finish the project, the kids then filled the cup with water, put the ball of dirt on top of the cup where the “wick” would siphon the water up to the dirt.  Then they were to bring the cup home and see what happened.  Kayla was so excited early last week when Sprouty first began to, well, sprout, and is even more excited now that he bears his luxuriant crop of hair.  Even I will admit that he’s rather cute.]
The second science project, which was for a grade,  was to either 1) build a model of the solar system, or 2) build a model of a planet and 3) pick a planet and find out some facts about it.  Kayla chose Venus because it was closest to Earth, and set out to find facts about it.  The computer search didn’t help a lot, so I reminded her of a “Cat in the Hat” book about the solar system we had bought her years ago that was in her bookcase, and pulled a book out of my book case called The Lives of the Planets.  She got her ten facts from them.  Since The Lives of the Planets is written pretty much on a layperson but graduate level, I was proud that she was able to pull any facts out of the text at all.  I do suspect that she might be one of the only fourth graders in her school to have said and written the phrase “plate tectonics.”  Whether she understands what they are is another issue.  I did my best to explain, but without a globe handy it was a little tough, and then she got distracted because my hand gestures made me look like I was an Indian attempting to talk in Indian sign language, so she was laughing too hard to pay a lot of attention.
Then we had to figure out how to do the model.  One good thing about Venus is the fact that it is so thickly covered with clouds, it is impossible to make out individual surface features, so we didn’t have to worry about including large features that you might be able to see from space like you would with the moon or Mars.  We did however have to find a suitable picture to base our model on, and after several internet searches, this is the picture she found:

The Planet Venus, from Nasa.gov

We looked at the photo for a day, then went to local Wal-mart, where Kayla found 2 of the only four round styrofoam balls left in the store and I found some very basic acrylic paints and brushes she could use (no, I was not willing to sacrifice my good acrylics and brushes to her pursuit of an education when I had a choice), and we set off home.  I made her paint the styrofoam ball white for a primer coat, then I selected several of the acrylic colors, put portions of them on a paper plate and let her do the mixing and painting from there.  Here is what she did:

Planet Venus model close up

The Planet Venus on the Study Table

I realize the planets usually do not have toothpicks on which to sit, but at the same time, round objects roll and we needed a way to get the model to sit still!

I thought it was a great model, and Kayla’s teacher must have too – she got 100!

Have a great day everyone!

Nancy

On the Art of Gentle Satire


Good morning Everyone!

I had a proud parent moment on Friday.  What caused that familiar heart thump with the shining glow that courses all over me whenever my daughter does something to make me proud? 

Did she make all A’s that week?  (No, that heart thump was Thursday.) 

 Did she save the world?  (Not yet, but I expect she will one day!)

Help out extra with the house?  (No, that heart thump was the last two Saturdays in a row.)

No, she used, for the first time that I can remember, the art of gentle satire to make a point .

Now, I need to backtrack.  Kayla is in a family where we a) love to laugh, b) admire the exceptionally witty response to any comment, and c) secretly believe that satire and sarcasm are spiritual gifts that Paul forgot to leave off of his list, quite unintentionally, of course.  FN. 1. 

When Kayla was four, she had been asking the same question over and over again, as children do, and about the fifth repeat Mark stopped and looked at her and said, “I know what you’re thinking, child.  Have I asked him five times, or six?  To tell you the truth, I’ve forgotten myself.  So the question is, are you feeling lucky today, kid?  Are you?  ARE YOU?”  FN.2

Mark and I were in gales, and Kayla thought her parents had lost their mind.

Ever since then, whenever a chance for gentle satire arises (one of the best kinds of humor is gentle satire that doesn’t leave a scar on your soul), Mark and I have started laughing, and Kayla just looks a little puzzled. 

But Friday, that changed. 

I went to pick her up and asked if she had received any numbers that day at school.  She told me she had received one, but it was for not being prepared.  (We don’t count those, really, even though we probably should; we are concerned with good behavior.)

I said something to the effect that the one number was okay, especially since it wasn’t a  conduct number, and the child turned to me in the front seat, folded her hands like the stereotypical picture of an angelic child, batted her eyes and said in a sickly sweet voice, “Why mother, your daughter would never do anything to earn a conduct number!  I’m a perfect angel!” 

I was so proud of her!  FN 3.

Have a great day everyone!

Nancy

 P.S.  If you have any comments you or your children have made that fall within the realm of gentle satire, please share them!  I would love to hear about it!

FN 1.  For people not familiar with the concept of spiritual gifts, read Galatians 5:22 in the New Testament, and then Google spiritual gifts and this reference will make a lot more sense.

FN 2.  If you don’t recognize that paraphrase, rent or download the movie “Dirty Harry” starring Clint Eastwood. 

FN 3.  She really has down amazingly well this year with conduct numbers.  I told her that, too, once I finished laughing at her first comment.   Purple Ambassadors is one of the best things that ever happened to her!

Rules I Never Thought I’d Need – The Extended Cut


Good morning everyone!

I hope you had a great Thanksgiving!  Back in March, some of you found this blog when I published a post called “Rules I Never Thought I’d Need” but some of you joined me afterwards.  Since March, I’ve been able to add a few more to the list, so I am republishing the list with my additions.  I hope you enjoy it as much as you did the first time!

Just for grins and giggles, I am going to go in reverse order.

1) Do not squirt the ink out of a ballpoint pen in the bathroom and mix it with water in order to make ink “like Harry Potter uses.”  (Age 10).

2) Do not lose control of the ballpoint pen and ink during the squirting process, spraying black ink all over the bathroom.  (Age 10).

3) If you do spray black ink all over the bathroom, do not fail to call in reinforcements immediately.  (Age 10).

4) Do not bring lady bugs, worms, crickets, roly-poly’s, moths, butterflies, lizards or any other type of insect or reptile  into the house as pets.  (Ages 5-10 and counting.)

5) Mom is the spider killing expert, but roaches need to be handled by Dad.

6)  When your mother who is recovering from surgery tells you she has to take a nap, gives you the run of the house and the back yard with the sole restriction being do not go out the front door until she is awake, do not lock the dogs in the back yard, and play with your friends for two hours with the front door open, you on the inside side of the door and your friends on the outside side of the door.  (Age 10).

7) Do not jam your elbow into a plastic hurricane glass until it gets stuck in an effort to keep the infinitesimal scratch on your elbow from getting wet in the bath and stinging.  (Age 9).

8 )  Do not feed paper to the dogs as a treat.  At least two of the three are dumb enough to believe you.  (Age 10).

9)  Soap is required for a bath to really be a bath.  (Age 5).

10)  Do not wash your hair with conditioner only.  (Age 8 through 9).

11) It’s not a good idea to fill the bathroom sink with Dixie cups and then fill it with water.  (Age  6 but she had help from a visiting 4-year-old.)

12)   Do not dump the entire bottle of shampoo in the tub to use as bubble bath.  (Ages 6 through 8).

13) Do not dump the entire bottle of liquid soap from the sink in the tub to use as bubble bath.   (Ages 6 through 8).

14) Do not dump the entire bottle of conditioner in the tub for reasons I have yet to understand.   (Ages 6 through 8).

15)  Do not drag a dog into the bathtub with you.   (Age 6).

16) The controls on the dashboard in the car,  including the radio, are MINE!  Please leave them alone.  (Ages 4 to 10 and counting).

17)  Do not try to pierce your ears with the end of a paper clip, even if it looks like an earring hole is there.  (Age 6 and 7).

18)  Do not cook eggs on the stove without a parent’s presence and permission.   (About age 7:  this one is harder to justify because the one time that she did cook the eggs by herself, she did a good job and remembered to turn the stove off, which is more than I do sometimes!)

19) Do not cut the screen out of its frame in the window.  (Age 5).

20)  Do not put anything in your ear, including rocks, without consulting an adult first.  (Age 4.)

21) Do not put anything in your nose, including wooden sticks, without consulting an adult first.   (Age 4)

22) Which led to:  Do not put anything in any body part for any reason unless a parent says it is okay, with the exception of food or drink in your mouth.

Have a great weekend everyone!

Nancy

A Highly Biased History of Bowling, Part II


Good morning everyone!

Today we are going to pick up the threads of the Ugg Clan’s history.  As you may, or may not, remember, in September we discussed Ugg the First’s invention of bowling.  (See, A Highly Biased History of Bowling.  For those of you who don’t remember the first appearance of Ugg and Uggette on this blog, please look at A Highly Biased History of Washing Machines.)

Alleytiri's Lost Bowling Set

We will pick up the threads of the story many generations down the road, with a member of the Ugg clan who had migrated to Egypt.  Ugghotep had a baby girl, Alleytiri, who was the apple of his eye.  (I should explain that the best historical records we can find indicate that early on, the Clan of Ugg was united by marriage with the Clan of Alley.)  As the oldest son in that generation of the Ugg clan, Ugghotep had inherited the original bowling stone Ugg had used, although by this time it was much smaller and smoother, having been worn down through the ages by so much use.  Since trying to bowl down Alleytiri was unthinkable, and with only one child would have been really boring anyhow, he invented a series of blocks that he and Alleytiri could bowl down together.  Unfortunately, as all children do from time to time, Alleytiri managed to lose the ball and pins, and they were found centuries later by archeologists.  This set of a round ball and pins is considered to be one of the oldest bowling type artifacts ever found.

King Edward III

We will lightly skip ahead in history to the mid-1300’s in England, when Sir Alley Ugg of  Diffing Green couldn’t help but notice that time was hanging too heavily on his archer’s hands, when arrows started appearing through the flags flying off the roof of the castle (not to mention the one that went through Lady Uggette’s of Diffing Green’s skirt on her way to church – it was shot by a particularly bad archer) and so introduced his family’s game to his archers.  The game quickly grew in popularity, and spread to other parts of the country, to the point where King Edward III banned bowling because his archers were spending too much time bowling and not enough time practicing archery.

King Henry VII on horseback, chasing after a stray ball rolled by one of his ladyfriends

A few hundred years later, though, it is reported that Lord Ugg Oop of Diffingshire (Diffingshire included the original lands of Diffing Green) introduced Henry VIII to the sport of bowling where it became very popular in King Henry’s court and thence throughout England.

Nine Pin Bowling Set

Eventually members of the Ugg-Oop clan emigrated to America, where unfortunately some of them slipped closer to the wrong side of the law.  Ugg Oopone, one of the seedier members of the family, saw a ….. ummmm… “business”  opportunity in the game of bowling, and set up a parlor in New York where people could bowl with nine-pins, and bet on the results.  This activity spread outward to places like Connecticut, which eventually banned nine-pin bowling because of the gambling problem.

A Modern Bowling Alley in Bowling Green, Ohio. Not owned by the Uggs of Bowling Green, Kentucky.

However, more reputable members of the family from Kentucky (where did you think Bowling Green got its name?) decided to use ten pins and reestablished the game as a more family friendly activity.

Pin Boys in Brooklyn

In the 1950’s, Oop Ugg Smith was working as a pin setter in his father’s bowling alley.  After a close call involving an airborne bowling ball and an argument between a husband and wife patron, his enthusiasm for the game dimmed.  Still, he didn’t want to leave his father in the lurch, so turning his very talented mechanical mind to the problem, he, along with his friend Gottfried Schmidt,  invented the pin-setter.  Gottfried, with Oop Ugg’s blessing, later patented the invention and sold the rights to the patent to the American Machine and Foundry Company (now AMF), which at that time was a maker of machinery for tobacco, apparel and bakery businesses.  Now, AMF Bowling Centers, Inc. is the world’s largest owner and operator of bowling centers.

Pinsetter patent excerpt

Although Oop Ugg Smith never came back to the game after his narrow escape, his children learned to love the game from their grandfather, and one of Oop Ugg Smith’s grandchildren, Alley Uggette Smith, loved the game like none of the Ugg clan had ever loved it before.  There was only one problem – Alley Uggette simply could not bowl.  No matter how hard she tried, her balls continually veered right or left in time to reach the gutter.  However, being as mechanically minded as her storied grandfather, Alley Uggette studied the problem carefully and came up with what I consider to be the greatest of all bowling inventions (because without it, I too would bowl only gutter balls), the GUTTER GUARD!!!!!  After that, Alley Uggette could bowl with the best of them; in fact, she became the expert on using a ricochet off the gutter guard at high-speed in order to conquer that most awkward of all bowling set-ups, the split.

Bowling Lane with Gutter Guards Up

And with the gutter guard, and the split, we have come full circle in the history of bowling.  You may not remember from the first post, but the first turn in bowling history by Ugg the First resulted in a split, with the smaller children scattering to avoid the ball, but the oldest two standing tall and firm.

Until the next time  we have a chance to explore the history of the Ugg clan, or until I think of something else to write about, have a great day everyone!

Nancy

Halloween Present: Princess Rapunzel


Hi Everyone!

Princess Rapunzel Checks Her Hair

You know I couldn’t post about Halloween Past without moving on to Halloween Present, didn’t you?  For those of you who are not enamored of pictures of someone else’s child, hang in there; I’ll have to find something else to talk about tomorrow! 

The princess ascends her throne

My Mom made every bit of this costume herself for Kayla, from the dress to the hair, and I think it is the most beautiful costume Kayla has had.

You called?

The first few pictures Kayla and I took Thursday night last week.  Kayla’s school was having Red Ribbon Week and the school book fair, and Friday they were allowed to dress up in costumes as book characters.

Kayla was a little indignant; other children in her class told her that Rapunzel was not a book character, and Kayla knew better. 

I'm not sure what she was doing here...

She decided to prove her point by taking the Rapunzel book she had to school with her.  I gathered from her Friday afternoon that producing the book pretty well squelched the “Rapunzel is not a book character” argument.

As Pretty A Princess As Can Be

The point is, though, that like any other wise mother who wants to have pictures of their child in a specific outfit, I decided to go ahead and take pictures on Thursday night in case the unthinkable occurred Friday and something – a stain, a tear or who knows what else – happened to the costume.

All modern princesses know how to use a PDA!

I needn’t have worried though; the costume came back home in pristine condition, and ready for its next escapade last night, when we went up to our church’s “Trunk or Treat” Festival. 

That first bite of candy!

The way Trunk or Treat works is that you arrive at the church as a family, register, and then you have a parking lot full of cars, SUV’s, trucks and even a fire truck that are decorated for Halloween with their trunks open and the child trick or treats her way around the circle of cars.  She came out with a pretty good haul!

Princess Rapunzel Considers the Best Way to Climb the Wall

After you completed the circle, the church had several blow up bouncy thingies (I don’t know anything more precise to call them, but I’m sure there is a term out there somewhere!) for the kids to play in.  The funniest conversation was listening to Kayla and a friend of hers from school that she ran into trying to figure out what to do with her skirt to help her participate in the bounce up and down house. 

Princess Rapunzel Climbs a Wall

In the end, she decided to leave it loose, since she had worn a pair of leggings underneath the skirt anyhow.  Leaving it loose didn’t hamper her jumping , nor did it restrain her when it came time to do the obstacle course.

Talking to Daddy

However, all good things must come to an end, even jumping on the bouncy thingies at the church carnival, so when we finally called her in, she had to put her sneakers back on.  (What?  You didn’t know that Princess dresses and sneakers are the height of high fashion at Court?  They are when it is cold outside!)  She did so talking non-stop to Mark.

She finally got her shoes on, and we headed back to the house for a quick supper, and then bed, one more Halloween under our belt!

Have a great day everyone!

Nancy

P.S.  Mom- thank you again for making the costume.  It is beautiful!

The Ghosts of Halloween Past


Hi Everyone!

In honor of Halloween, here are some photographs of the ghosts of Halloween past.

It will not surprise you , when you see this picture, to learn that I had to dig long and hard in the archives before I found it.  This is myself and one of my sisters in our Halloween costumes that I am pretty sure my mother made for us.

While there should be more pictures of my and my sisters from Halloween, apparently I don’t have them, but what I do have are plenty of pictures from Kayla’s Halloweens (except 2009, which was an odd year.)

Halloween, 2005

This was our first Halloween together as a family.  Kayla would have still been three, but just about ready to turn four.

We lived in a real neighborhood then, one with sidewalks and everything, so we knew we would have trick-or-treaters come by our house.  Mark’s mother was kind enough to come by to answer our door while we took Kayla trick or treating for the first time.

She remembered to wait politely at the door.

But there were some places she wasn’t altogether sure of!

Halloween, 2006

This was the year she decided to be Cinderella.  I think my mom bought her costume this year for her as a gift.  These pictures are from our church carnival.

I think she was happy!

Obviously, candy wasn’t the only attraction to the carnival!

The Princess Slide!

Halloween, 2007

I made Kayla’s costume this year, for two reasons.  One is, I just think every mother should make her child’s costume at least once.  The second is, she wanted to be a bunny rabbit and off the shelf bunny rabbit costumes can be hard to find!  I’ll let you decide which reason was more important.

 Even as a rabbit, she was a lean, mean pumpkin pushing machine!

Oh – and that year Mark’s work had a Halloween costume contest.  He won!

Halloween, 2008

This year was unusual because we had very little time to get ready for Halloween.  Kayla had walking pneumonia for the two weeks before Halloween, and was just back out and about, so we got her costume at the last minute.  She decided to be a fairy.

She and I went to the Halloween carnival together.

I think she had fun again.  I put a little make-up on her, which was (and still is) a very rare treat. 

Halloween 2009

I cannot find the Halloween pictures from 2009, (they’re probably hidden somewhere completely logical like in a folder marked “Football Game”) but go back up to the bunny rabbit costume, picture it with longer sleeves with elastic at the wrists, a stuffed cat tail instead of the short cotton tail, and done in yellows and browns instead of all white, and you will get the idea!  I made the costume that year both because I wanted to and because she announced emphatically that she wanted to be a cat with a real tail for Halloween that year, and I wasn’t sure else how to get a real tail besides to make it.

Halloween 2010

Last year, Kayla decided to be The Little Mermaid.  This costume, she and my mom picked out together.  We got a chance to have her put it on and take some pictures before we went out anywhere, and we had fun with it.  Here, the Little Mermaid is holding court in her….kitchen (?)

Kayla decorated a pumpkin last year by drawing on it, and she did a great job. 

And finally, what is the use of doing a photo shoot if you don’t get to goof around at least a little?

I’m not sure she knew I actually took that picture…

 Have a great day everyone!

Nancy

Binoculars!


Hi Everyone!

Kayla has recently found a new toy to play with that gives her hours of enjoyment on the back porch with both Mandy and Darwin in tow – binoculars!  Now that the weather has cooled off a little bit, it is very pleasant on a Saturday or Sunday afternoon to be out on the porch, so she will take the two youngest dogs out with her (sometimes they go voluntarily, sometimes involuntarily) and walk around the porch staring into the woods at the end of the court to see if she can see the deer, or any other type of wildlife.  We have told her that the deer are not out much in the middle of the day, but since youth is ever hopeful, she has blithely ignored that unpleasant fact and happily searches.  She did get to watch our neighbor’s Yorkie chase a cat through the woods for a little ways one day; I was a little surprised that the cat ran, since it was bigger and stronger than the Yorkie, but run it did.  Oh well, there are a lot worse things she could do, and the view from the porch is certainly stunning this time of year!

View from our porch!

She has, she believes, learned the ins and outs of nursing parents through surgery.  She announced to my Mom-in-law yesterday, when she was told in the course of good-byes to take good care of me, that I was easy to take care of; you just needed to provide me with a pillow and my best friend, Diet Coke, and I would be happy!  I am sure Mark and Mom, both of whom have been very good to me this first post-surgery week listened to that with an exclamation point.  It’s been a lot more work for them than just giving me Diet Cokes and pillows! 

The dogs certainly have enjoyed this past week; there’s been a lot less crating because someone has been at the house more, giving them extra time to pursue their busy nap schedules.  Mandy is particularly concerned; every so often, she jumps up with great haste from the spot where she is napping, rushes over to another spot, and settles in for her next nap.  I don’t know why she couldn’t just stay in the first spot, but it seems to be important to her.

Mandy

I better sign off now; I am seeing a rope toy making huge circles behind my mother, so I need to make sure that Darwin isn’t about to do something silly.

Darwin

Have a great day everyone!

Nancy